Breath

Our house is officially for sale.

This house that we have painstakingly remodeled, added on to, but mostly loved.

This house that I thought would be my forever home. 

It's okay tho. I know that while I crave control to the depth's of my being, God get's the last say so. And while this still may be my forever home, I have to be open to finding out if this is not the plan He has in store.

With all of the pain that is going on right now, I am trying to find joy in what the Lord is bringing to the forefront. I am trying not to analyze my life to death, but I have become the person I am today because I am open to the wisdom that God provides for me each day. 

So often, I sit in the presence of my maker and have a conversation that goes something like this:

me: Where is it that we will be going today? I know Your plans for me are for good.  So I am trying not to fear.  

Him: Good and faithful child...I love that you think of me often.  I smile each time I come to your mind. You certainly don't need to worry, even though you have mastered this ability! (Insert God winking and smiling here...afterall, He did invent humor!) 

me: Okay. But sometimes old habits die hard.

Him: Just trust me to show you the way. Take the necessary steps to find out if I will open a new door or close a door you thought I wanted you to go through. 

me: I'm kind of scared.

Him:  I know. Just allow yourself to be at peace not matter what the situation.

me: I'll try.

Him: That's all I ever ask of you. And by the way, I am confident you will be successful! (Insert another wink and a smile here.)

While I can't say that I am jumping up and down with glee that we are trying to sell our home and move again, I can say that I am filled with a sense of peace that only the Lord can provide.  Each time I find myself flailing about in my head, I stop, take a deep breath, and put my thoughts on Jesus. I remind myself that nothing can be as daunting as what He endured.

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